Psalm 16

My email in box is overflowing because I haven't cleaned it out recently. My husband had to get up at 3:30 this morning and left before I woke up to go for a physical 5am at Fort Mead. He closes tonight and I won't see him until about 11 o'clock. I've got a big project with a due date fast approaching and I haven't had time to work on it. It's Monday. It's that icky part of fall where everything's cold and dead but there's no redeeming snowfall. I haven't been out in the woods in ages. I'm not exercising. My best friend has been in the UK for 3 weeks and I'm jealous. Another of my good friends just had a baby and I'm jealous. Another of my good friends is back in Misourri with her sister, whose due to have a baby any day now and I miss her alot. Another of my good friends is studying abroad in Mexico this semester and I just learned she's going to Guatemala for 2 weeks after exams. I miss her and I'm jealous. I may have to leave my church in a year or so.

And if that were't enough, I just noticed my stapler is jammed.

I'm a little down.

STOP - here I go with the neutral language. Scripture never uses the word "down". Let's try again. How about self-piteous? Looks like I've got a bit of a self-focus issue...

Time to bring out the weaponry. Paul refers to scripture as our sword. He's not kidding.

A couple weeks ago the girls in my caregroup helped me see some sin (specifically a lack of joy) and advised me to memorize Psalm 16. Let's see if I can get through it here...

Preserve me, Oh lord, for in you I take refuge.

I say to the Lord, you are my Lord, I have no good apart from you.

As for the saints in the land, they are the excellent ones, in whom is all my delight.

The sorrows of those who run after another God shall multiply,

Their drink offerings of blood I will not pour out, or take their names on my lips.

The Lord is my portion and my cup, you hold my lot.

The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places.

Indeed I have a beautiful inheretance

I bless the Lord who gives me counsel.

In the night also my heart instructs me.

I have set the Lord always before me.

Since he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.

Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices.

For in your presense there is fullness of joy, and at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

Well, almost. I'll pin it down on the busride home. It's a good one to memorize and have in your back pocket. In God's presence there is fullness of joy and pleasures forever more. So what if my stapler is jammed. Its hard to have my husband gone so much when everyone around me seems to have their husband home every night. It's hard to be "waiting for life to start" with children and travel and a house. But In God's presence there is fullness of joy and pleasures forevermore. He instructs me and gives me counsel. The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places. He is my refuge. I have no good apart from him. This is truth, and a bad day doesn't change it.

This is the time when I've got to grab on to what's true and squeeze it until my heart beleives it.