Surfing the net...

I work at a medical school. My department only teaches one semester out of the year. When the course isn't in session, I have alot of free time on my hands. Being stuck at a desk really doesn't leave me much to do but to surf the internet.

So! What are some of my favorite web sites?

The GirlTalk Blog - A mom and her three daughters blogging about biblical womanhood and how to live it practically.

The MarriedLife Blog - maintained by my favorite pastor and his pastoral cohorts (namely the pastors who minister to married couples at my church). They blog about how to live out married life to the glory of God.

Eternal Perspective Ministries - Randy Alcorn's site. Randy is a pastor in Oregon, and this site keeps alot of articles posted, in which he answers questions people have asked him, as well as just his own thoughts. You can get to these articles by going to www.epm.org, then on the left side bar click "resources". The topics are shown on the next page. Here's a tiny sample.

Project Gutenburg - an online library of thousands of titles that have expired copyrights (sorry, you won't find The Chronicles of Narnia here, I checked)

University of Adelaide, Australia's Sherlock Holmes Library - Self explanitory. A specific section of another online library.

Desiring God - The ministry of John Piper. I like it because (you guessed it) the site has an online libarary!

Hey, if ya gotta surf the web, might as well learn something, right? Enjoy!

I did it!

I did it! I got up early today and had my quiet time!

...I know, lots of people get up early enough to accomplish everything they need to in the morning. But I'm finding with this thyroid disorder I'm particularly susceptible to exhaustion, so getting up before I absolutely have to is a battle won for me.

So, what'd everyone get for Christmas? My gifts showed that my husband had been studying me all year and stockpiling ideas. He's the best. But I got something even better than my new Birkenstock sandals...

This is putting it nicely, but I got a little irritable over the Christmas holiday. You may be thinking "Who doesn't?" Well, that may be true that nobody doesn't, but it's also true that everybody shouldn't. Our emotions are a warning system that alerts us to what's going on in our hearts. An upset in my emotions revealed sin in my heart - and after not a little bad fruit, I was forced to really examine that sin. (Next time I'll try to pay attention to the red flag of irritability and do a heart check then instead of waiting for bad fruit to show up!)

But herein lay my Christmas present. When I saw how sin could just erupt from my heart, I was confronted with the reality of my absolute sinfulness. In contrast to that was the absolute holiness and purity of God. Quite an adjustment - but a merciful one. What greater gift could I have received from the Lord than a proper understanding of myself, and a proper understanding of Him? In other words, what mercy of the Lord to make known to me that I was viewing myself improperly (as not sinful) and viewing Him improperly (as someone whom I didn't need and unworthy of my devotion)? Because functionally, that's what I was saying with my actions. What a dangerous position to have put myself in!

Once I realized what was going on, I was able to go back to God, confess my pride and sinful actions, and enter back into the safety of His help in fighting my sin. I can't let my guard down and believe even for a second that I can depend on myself, 'just this once'. It's a dangerous and slippery slope.

So remembering that, I was able to rouse myself from bed this morning and have my quiet time, even though I was tired. See why I'm so excited? =)

Christmas Dinner!

Last year (What Stephan and I are calling "Christmas zero"), we had big plans. We'd reserved a cabin in the Shenandoah mountains! The hike in takes about 2 and a half hours, on a sporadically steep incline.

The last time we made the trip was with a class at in college. It was a terribly precarious journey in - The snow was packed down into slick ice by that time. I remember looking down and seeing something silver frozen into the ice on the trail. I took out my pocket knife and chiseled the thing out - a flashlight. On that same trip we got real chummy with fire. The cabin's potbelly stove was our best friend in the freezing temperatures. My boots nearly melted when I used them to whack the fire back into the fireplace (yes, it had fallen out). And Stephan nearly set the wooden table inside the cabin ablaze with a white gas stove. The invigorating mountain air, the view, and waking up to the sound of your professor's chainsaw were more than we ever could have hoped for. Anyone who knows us wouldn't wonder for a second why we wanted to go back there for our 'first christmas.'

We reserved the cabin and were well into making plans when Stephan confessed to me he was feeling sick. Two days before we were supposed to leave found Stephan on the couch with a fever and the chills, and I at my desk writing the cancelation letter for our cabin reservations. I slipped the key into the envelope and hoped that they'd have compassion on us when they learned our circumstances and refund our money. They didn't. Our first christmas came and went in a blur of fitful sleep for the sick and the caretaker.

So here it is Christmas again. We've mutually decided that last Christmas doesn't count. It's Christmas zero. This year will be Christmas one. And how are we shaping up this year?

Pretty well I think! We've got our tree set up. The stockings are hung by the bookcase with care. I found an amazing sugar-cookie recipe and have made Christmas cookies. Shopping is done and presents are appearing under the tree. Traditions are being instated. Going through the book of Luke at church has really helped to keep my focus on what Christmas is really about. And Christmas is on a Sunday this year - so I get to go to Church on Christmas! (a dream of mine since childhood.)

But christmas dinner is probably the thing I'm looking forward to most. I love cooking, so planning this meal has been really enjoyable. First will come the homemade pumpkin marmalade and goat cheese on warm oat bread. After that it's on to the main meal - Lapin aux Herbes de la Garrigue. Rabbit with wild herbs. We're doing steamed asparagus, dill-seasoned carrots and mashed potatoes as side dishes. Baked cinnamon apples are in line for dessert. We're mulling red wine as well (seasoning it with whole nutmeg, cinnamon, cloves, and sugar). The best thing about it is that Stephan is really excited. I really hope it blesses him.

The Gospel

My husband got up this morning and shouted that which he's been shouting for about 2 weeks now - properly modified, of course:

There's only 3 more sleeps 'till Christmas!!

Christmas is getting closer. And as it does, I find myself increasingly tempted to forget why I celebrate and be overwhelmed by all the 'stuff' I've got to do. So I need a reminder: I celebrate because my savior, Jesus, was born on Christmas. Oh man, Jesus again. What's so special about him? Why is he getting so much attention? I'd love to tell you.

There are a few other things you have to understand before you can understand why Jesus is so special. The first is you have to understand God.

God is holy. All those 'rules' in the Bible are merely a description of God's character. When he calls us to be patient, he's already been perfectly consistent in patients. When he calls us to be loving, he's already been perfectly consistent in love. "Holy", (very) simply put, means never having broken any of these rules - never violated the standard.

God is also just. Since he created the universe, he's got the right to also create 'the rules'. God is the earth's authority, and his rules are to be obeyed. When we disobey, it's called 'sin'. When we break the rules, we aren't just misbehaving. We're violating the holy standard - we're rebelling against a holy God. As John Piper puts it in his book The Passion of the Christ, "Sin isn't trivial - it's treason." When there's rebellion in an earthly kingdom, the King must address the rebels and administer justice. God can let no sin go unpunished or he wouldn't be perfectly just. He has to bring the sinners to justice.

God is also loving. He created us and he loves us - without condition.

We also have to understand who we are. We are sinners. The bible doesn't mince words about this:

"...For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." -Romans 3:23

Pretty clear. All. No one is without sin. So what's so bad about this? Well, we've already seen that sin is breaking the rules and rebelling against God. When we break the rules, we violate God's holiness. God can't allow sin into his presence because he would be tainted. One sin - breaking the rules only once - is enough to make us unholy - to make us sinners - and thus estrange us from God. This is the human condition - we are separated from God by our sin.

This leaves us in a very precarious place. If we aren't near God, we're far away. And after we die, we'll still be far away. This is the true gravity of our situation. After death, 'with God' is heaven - 'far away from God' is hell. Because of our sin, we're all hell bound.

You may have caught a contradiction by this point. But how can God allow that? Didn't I say earlier that God is perfectly loving and loves us unconditionally? This doesn't jive.

Another thing about God is that he will not fudge on any part of his character to satisfy another part. He can't fudge on his justice to be all loving, and he can't fudge on his love to administer justice. So now it seems to us like God kinda has a problem. How can he punish us for our sin - for our rebellion - and still love us regardless of our sinfulness?

This is the exciting part! God came up with the most ingenious plan. He created a substitute for us. Guess who? Right - Jesus. We stood before God as rebels stand before a king - worthy of the kings wrath and punishment. But God sent his son, Jesus, born on Christmas, to live a perfectly sinless life. Because he did that, he didn't have any of his own sin to be punished for, and he could be our substitutionary 'whipping boy'. God punished him for our sins - that's what happened on the Cross. Did you see The Passion of the Christ movie? Pretty nasty, huh? Well, when you consider that Jesus was enduring the punishment for every sin committed by every person in every generation in every nation in the whole world for all time - well, that's a lot of punishment. But Jesus did it willingly out of love. God did it willingly out of love.

So now all parts of God's character are satisfied: His justice was satisfied because our sins were punished - but the punishment was dealt to Christ instead of us. His love is satisfied because now, if we've accepted Christ's sacrifice on our behalf, God doesn't see us as sinners and rebels - he sees us as perfectly obedient, just like Jesus was, and there's no need to punish us. His holiness is satisfied because since we've been credited with Jesus' obedience, we aren't bringing sin into his presence. He remains perfectly holy.

See what happened? God, in his love, provided a way out! There's now the potential for a swap! Jesus took on all our sin. That part's done. We can now take this 'escape hatch' from hell by taking on all his obedience. This is where we have a choice to make: are we going to accept Jesus substitution for us? It's not as easy as just saying "sure, I accept." We've got to honestly and humbly admit that yes, we are rebels. We don't want to submit to God's rules. We want to make our own rules, and because of that, we need someone to be perfectly obedient on our behalf - we need a savior. Once we admit that, we've got to be willing to lay down all the rules we were living by and submit to God's rules - which are ultimately better for us because God loves us so much and wants the best for us.

And what's all this? This is the Good News - that's what "Gospel" means. And it is the best news we could ever have recieved! When Christians talk about the Gospel, this is what they mean.

I hope this explains why I was so excited by "being reconciled to God", like I wrote in yesterday's post. As a person who was on her way to hell, being close to God again with the hope of heaven is better than anything else!

If you're reading this and have already put your faith in Christ, be encouraged afresh! If you're reading this and haven't, I'd encourage you to explore it more. Thumbs up or down on this is the most important choice you'll ever make. I'd encourage you to find a church this Christmas eve and check this all out more. Of course, I'm partial to my family of churches (called sovereign Grace), so I'll link to the locator on their web site. I'd really encourage you to check one out if it's near you.

Whatever happens, have a great Christmas, and thanks for sticking it out through a long post!

Christmas Carols

As I wrote earlier, Stephan and I went to see the US Navy Band in concert recently. They're a very talented group. I love seeing them perform. But this year it wasn't the performance that struck me.

The chior sang Hark! The herald angels sing. As they sang, I found myself for the first time really taking in the lyrics. After two verses I leaned over to my husband and whispered "I wonder if they have any idea what they're singing..."

Listen:

Hark! The herald angels sing,

“Glory to the newborn King;

Peace on earth, and mercy mild,

God and sinners reconciled!”

Joyful, all ye nations rise,

Join the triumph of the skies;

With th’angelic host proclaim,

“Christ is born in Bethlehem!”

Hark! The herald angels sing,

"Glory to the newborn King."

God and sinners reconciled. I found myself getting really excited as the song went on. What a victory anthem! We've been reconciled to God!

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation." -2 Corinthians 5:17-19 (emphasis mine)

How exciting! And that's just scratching the surface of the truth and hope this song recounts. Think about what it's saying: our savior was born. The only person who could reconcile us to God was finally on the scene. The drama of redemption was finally beginning.

If you're shaking your head asking "What the heck does all that mean?" - check back tomorrow. It could be the biggest favor you ever do yourself. Until then, here's the rest of Hark! The herald angels sing (even the verses not usually sung at Christmas). As you hear Christmas carols sung on the radio and in the mall this year, stop and take in the lyrics. Let them point you back to the "Reason for the Season."

Hark! The herald angels sing,

“Glory to the newborn King;

Peace on earth, and mercy mild,

God and sinners reconciled!”

Joyful, all ye nations rise,

Join the triumph of the skies;

With th’angelic host proclaim,

“Christ is born in Bethlehem!”
Hark! the herald angels sing,

“Glory to the newborn King!”

Christ, by highest Heav’n adored;

Christ the everlasting Lord;

Late in time, behold Him come,

Offspring of a virgin’s womb.

Veiled in flesh the Godhead see;

Hail th’incarnate Deity,

Pleased with us in flesh to dwell,

Jesus our Emmanuel.

Hark! the herald angels sing,
“Glory to the newborn King!”

Hail the heav’nly Prince of Peace!

Hail the Sun of Righteousness!

Light and life to all He brings,

Ris’n with healing in His wings.

Mild He lays His glory by,

Born that man no more may die.

Born to raise the sons of earth,

Born to give them second birth.
Hark! the herald angels sing,
“Glory to the newborn King!”

Come, Desire of nations, come,

Fix in us Thy humble home;

Rise, the woman’s conqu’ring Seed,

Bruise in us the serpent’s head.

Now display Thy saving power,

Ruined nature now restore;

Now in mystic union join

Thine to ours, and ours to Thine.
Hark! the herald angels sing,
“Glory to the newborn King!”

Adam’s likeness, Lord, efface,

Stamp Thine image in its place:

Second Adam from above,

Reinstate us in Thy love.

Let us Thee, though lost, regain,

Thee, the Life, the inner man:

O, to all Thyself impart,

Formed in each believing heart.
Hark! the herald angels sing,
“Glory to the newborn King!”

Author: Charles Wesley

A different Christmas poem

For Baba, Uncle Dave, and Tom, with all my love and thanks.

The enbers glowed softly, and in their dim light,

I gazed round the room and I cherished the sight.

My wife was asleep, her head on my chest,

My daughter beside me, angelic in rest.

Outside the snow fell, a blanket of white,

Transforming teh yard to a winter delight.

The sparkling lights in the tree I beleive,

completed the magic that was Christmas Eve.

My eyelids were heavy, my breathing was deep.

Secure and surrounded by love I would sleep.

In perfect contentment, or so it would seem,

So I slumbered, perhaps I started to dream.

The sound wasn't loud, and it wasn't too near,

But I opened my eyes when it tickled my ear.

Perhaps just a cough, I didn't quite know,

Then the sure sound of footsteps outside in the snow.

My soul gave a tremble, I struggled to hear,

and I crpt to the door just to see who was near.

Standing out in teh cold dark of the night,

A lone figure stood, his face weary adn tight.

I serviceman, I puzzled, some twenty years old,

all dressed in cammies, hudled here in the cold.

Alone in the dark, he looked up and smiled,

standing watch over me, my wife and my child.

"What are you doing?" I asked without fear.

"Come in this moment! It's freezing out here!

Put down your pack, brush the snow from your sleeve-

You should be at home on a cold Christmas Eve!"

For barely a moment I saw his eyes shift

Away from the cold and teh snow blown in drifts...

To the window that dance with a warm fire' light.

Then sighed and he said "It's really alright.

I'm out here by choice. I'm here every night.

"It's my duty to stand at the front of the line

that separates you from teh darkest of times.

No one had to ask or beg or implore me.

I'm proud to stand here like my fathers before me.

"My Gramps died at 'Pearl on a day in December,"

then he sighed, "That's a christmas 'Gram always remembers.

My dad stood his watch in teh junbles of 'Nam

and now it's my turn and so, here I am.

I've not seen my own son in more than a while,

But my wife sends me pictures - he's sure got her smile."

Then he bent and he carefully pulled from his bag-

The Red, White and Blue - The American Flag.

"I can live through teh cold and the being alone,

away from my family, my house and my home.

I can stand at my post through teh rain and teh sleet

I can sleep in a foxhole with little to eat.

I can carry the weight of killing another,

or lay down my life with my sister and brother,

who stand at the front against any and all,

to ensure for all time that this flag will not fall.

"So go back inside," he said. "Harbor no fright.

Your family is waiting and I'll be all right."

"But isn't there something I can do at the least?

Give you money?" I asked. "Or prepare you a fest?

It seems all too little for all that you've done,

For being away from your wife and your son."

Then his eye welled a tear that held no regret.

"Just tell us you love us, and never forget

To fight for our rights back at home while we're gone

to stand your own watch, no matter how long.

For when we come home, either standing or dead

to know you remember we fought and we bled

Is payment enough, and with that we will trust

that we mattered to you as you mattered to us.

Thanks for all you've done.

Christ-mas

So, Christmas is coming. Have you ever thought of what all the hoopla is about? I don't mean the Santas and christmas trees and presents. Not that part. Let's think about it a little.

"Christmas". Where'd the word come from? As I understand it, it's an Old English term employed by the church. Christ-mas. The best dictionary in the world, The Oxford English Dictionary, helps us break the word up. We all know who Christ is. But what's the "-mas" part?

MASS n.1 as the second element in compounds occurs both with the sense ‘a (celebration of the) mass (of a kind specified by the first element)’ and with the sense ‘the festival of (the person or thing denoted by the first element)’.

We're more familiar with this word when used in terms of the Catholic Mass. This wasn't the only "-mas" that the old church celebrated. There was Martinsmas on November 11, the feast of St. Martin. There was Michaelmas on September 29, the feast of St Michael. There was Petermas on August 1, the fest of St. Peter. There was even Hallowmas on November 1 (making the day before - October 31 - Hallow's Eve, later shortened to Hallow'en, colloquially Halloween). So the -mas suffix tells us that there's a celebration for or concerning the first part of the word. On Christmas, it's a celebration for Christ.

I love etymology!

Dehydrated

Ever been dehydrated? I have. I'm prone to it - not because I need more water than the average person, but because I often don't drink enough. I get all the typical warning signs: chapped lips, headache, pastey mouth. It's easy to fix - just drink some water. Most of the symptoms go away almost instantaneously. It's easy to keep well hydrated too - just sip water throughout the day. Keep it on hand and drink it.

My spirit is the same way. If I don't get a drink of God throughout the day, I can start to see the warning signs of spiritual dehydration: I'm irritable, prideful, judgemental, discontent, lazy and fearful - amongst other things. I've been noticing it in myself lately. As the holiday's draw closer and the heat is on with extra long to-do lists, I've allowed my daily time with God to dwindle to nothing. I'm not drinking deep of Godps promises, love, comfort and strength. I'm not meditating on the Gospel. I'm not remembering that I need a savior. And when that happens...well, my sin starts to have it's say in my life. It comes out my mouth. It shows in my actions. It grows in my heart.

This is why, when I start to notice patterns of sin in my life, The first question I ask myself (but not the last) is "how have my quiet times been lately?" Usually if a sin is spirialing out of control, it's a symptom of having not been communing with God regularly. If I were communing with God regularly - "sipping throughout the day", or at least having a big glass in the morning - these things don't have such a stronghold on me. I don't mean to say that reading the Bible or praying automatically makes us immune to our sins. However, if we're reading the Bible and praying regularly we've got the word of God in our minds and hearts more deeply and consistantly. That is what makes the difference in our lives. It has nothing to do with "having a quiet time". It has everything to do with keeping the promises of God and the knowledge of his gospel close at hand - like a water bottle. When our heart is well hydrated with these things, we don't see as many symptoms of spiritual dehydration as we would whey they're absent.

So, how have your quiet times been lately?

Just the right time

Stephan and I went and saw the US Navy Band perform at Constitution Hall on Saturday night. The concert is always great, and we always love it. My work provides free tickets, so we grab two every year.

But Stephan got off work late. I had to scramble to get dinner prepared and ready to be eaten in the car, then rush to pick him off and get goin'. We arrived 10 minutes before showtime, so I jumped out to grab the tickets while Stephan went to find a place to park.

I got the tickets and then sat down to wait. While I waited, I made the mistake of letting my mind idle. Before I knew it I was in fully complaining mode. "Why does this always happen?" I thought. "We always show up late to stuff like this...It's because of Stephan's job. What an awful job he has. How dare they keep him late so consistently. And he has to work so much. They're such a greedy company. Why God? Why can't we have a dependable schedule? We just want to plan our life! Why do you allow everything to get so out of control?"

That's when it hit me - hard.

You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly.

Romans 5:6 (NIV). When God swings, he uses a big bat. I caught it full in the presumptuous head. "Kari, the act that saved your soul from hell was performed at just the right time. I can take care of the time Stephan gets out of work, or the time you make it into the concert."

What an adjustment. I repented. I thanked God for the provision that Stephan's job was, and his kindness in allowing us to see the concert for free, and that I had a savior who died for my specific sin in that specific moment.

The concert was wonderful - even if we missed the first two numbers. We were still treated to 3 large, burley seamen singing "Christmas don't be late" - in full chipmunk voices (yes, it sounded like they'd taken helium before coming out on stage!), "Mr. Grinch", "I wanna be a Christmas tree", and "Grandma got run over by a reigndeer". What could be better than watching such a great performance, all the while aware of God's amazing mercy and saving plan - which was set in motion on Christmas?

Manicure

I did it.

I cut my nails.

...big deal, huh? Well, it is to me.

I was in Pisa, Italy a few years back. The group I was with had arrived there that day and hadn't made any plans for a place to stay. We went from place to place, finding nothing, and finally came upon a very sympathetic desk clerk. His hotel was full, but he really wanted to help us. He would have let us sleep in the lobby if he was sure his manager wouldn't be stopping in. He spent the next 45 minutes making calls for us. The first time he picked up the phone, I noticed it. "You play guitar?" I asked. He looked up from the phone and smiled, then nodded. He knew how I knew, but my friend standing nearby didn't. So she asked. "He's got the nails," I answered.

It's a lopsidded by tell-tale way to keep your nails. Down to almost the nubbs on your chord hand and long and well manicured on your strumming hand (which for me is the left and right respectively.) Why bother with such a funny manicure though? It's the most practical for the school of guitar playing I practice: flatpicking, or fingerstyling. You pluck the individual strings instead of just strumming a chord.

So I've cut the fingernails on my left hand down to the almost the skin. This is a big deal. By doing this I'm making a commitment to actually play my guitar.

There's an amazing musician downstairs in the office where I work. Every time I see him, he asks if I've been playing. I smile sadly and tell him 'no'. Regreat always wells in my heart when I see Sunni (my guitar) leaning in the corner, not being played. There was a time when it stayed on the couch and I played it every day when I came home.

So I've cut my fingernails.

Al Petteway is definitely my musical hero. He told a story once of a time when he was performing at a Scottish music festival. Of course, he was wearing a kilt, and had the tall Aran knit socks and ankle sheath for a Sgian Dubh ('skeen doov' - gaelic for 'black knife') like traditional Scotsmen do. But in his sheath he kept a metal emory board instead of a knife. He'd use it to file his nails if they broke during concert.

So I've cut my fingernails.
Sunni's coming out of the corner.

Music

Music. One of my passions. ...I know what you're thinking "I didn't know you loved music." Most people don't. It's not really a part of my life I share with others. It's my own fault. And frankly, I've let my musical...uh, "talents" fall into terrible disrepair over the past year.

But - I went to the most amazing concert Monday! It was an annual event put on by the Institute of Musical Tradition. They bring together three of my favorite artists: Al Petteway and Amy White (married) and Robin Bullock. Amy and Robin are multi instrumentalist and Al plays anything with a neck that can be strummed (Guitar, Bouzouki, Banjo - you name it). These three do a celtic Christmas performance every year (granted there's precious little that's celtic about it, but I don't nit-pick with these guys). I've been to two of these annual concerts and hope to make it tradition for as long as I'm in the area. Anyway, I'll just post some thoughts on some of their songs. Click on the song titles for links to mp3 samples.

Al and Amy's Midnight Ride: (second under Acoustic Journey album) This has got to be one of my all time favorites by this pair. The cadence is spectacular. I've never heard a piece where it's better applied than here. I don't know how many of you have ever ridden horseback. I had the privilege of riding with a superb stable when I lived in North Carolina. This piece actually sounds like the drum of horse hooves and feels like the steady rhythm of posting. Add to that the beautiful imagery associated with midnight - dark sky with glittering stars, trees leaning back and forth in the breeze - you're truly transported.

Al and Amy's Black Bear's Picnic: (second under the Land of the Sky album) Picture that you live in the North Carolina Highlands. Then picture little black bear cubs coming through a freshly fallen snow to raid your trashcans - that's celtic harp melody. Then picture big mama bear lumbering out of the trees to join them - that's the rhythmic guitar underbelly. Very cute!

Robin's Carol of the Bells: (Track 8) Robin has gotten so much praise for this piece. It's never been recorded on solo guitar before because of it's unique composition. "In desperation" he says, he finally invented a new tuning for his guitar, and was able to record this song. It's history is beautiful. It's based on an old Ukrainian melody, and was composed by Mykola Dmytrovich Leontovich in the late 1800s. His goal was to portray the snowy wind blowing through a small Ukrainian village at midnight. I've spent time in the Ukraine, and I remember the wind blowing hard through the streets. There's something kind yet cautious about the Ukrainians - they are a strong and intrepid people, ready to admit their blessings, yet they always seemed a tinge sad. They are truly a people of a minor key. This song captures all I remember about them.

Animals!

Time for a fun post!

I'm going to dedicate this series of fun animal pictures to Shadow, who brought me so much laughter and joy - even if it was only over the telephone!

Out of place

Sitting down at my desk at work is like sitting down to work in a christian fortune-cookie factory. I've got quotes, hymns, and bible verses on little white slips of paper taped to every surface. Over here? "It is well with my soul" by Horatio Spafford. Over there? Psalm 16. There's a quote from a Randy Alcorn book just below my monitor's power button, and the song "Beautiful Savior" near my teapot. Then, over my scanner there's something completely out of place. A Japanese proverb. It reads as follows:

The reputation of a thousand years may be determined by the conduct of a single hour.

I don't remember where I read it, but it really affected me, so I wrote it down. Once a few years ago, some good friends of mine were housing a church intern from the west coast. He had the misfortune of walking through - yes through - a glass door. No one forgot this his entire stay. I remember one night, some time after it happened, it came up jokingly in conversation again. This fellow cried out (laughing all the while, to his credit) "You know, I could do anything - anything - I could call down the holy spirit in power - and I would still be the 'guy who walked through the door'" He was right. This incidend gave him a reputation, and it would be with him for the rest of his life, most probably.

Fortunately, this wasn't what we'd call a 'big deal'. He walked through a door. So what. But it does illistrate what this Japanese proverb is saying: be on guard. But why? As christians there's much more at stake than our own reputations. At stake in our conduct is the glory of God.

Over and over in scripture we're cautioned to act in a certain way "to the glory of God." 1 Peter 2:11-12 encourages us to abstain from sinful indulgence so that when non-believers see us they'll give glory to God. Romans 15:5-7 tells us to accept one another just as Christ accepted us to God's glory. Matthew 5:14-16 tells us to let our light shine befor men to bring glory to God. And 1 Corinthians 10:31 tells us simply:

So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do it all to the glory of God.

Over and over we're admonished to watch our actions, because if we don't, God isn't glorified.

Do you know any people who have sworn off Christianity because of the actions of people who claimed to be Christians? I know alot. I appreciate their honesty in saying that they want no part of a religion full of hypocrits. Do you see though, how the God of love can be robbed of his glory by our actions? Our character witness is a powerful thing. It is the front line of what people look to to see a reflection of God. We need to be watchful, because in the course of 1 hour, we can make an lasting impression of the God we serve. We don't want it to be distorted.

Busy

Ever burned yourself out on housework? I do frequently. I've grown to love the calling on my life as a wife, but sometimes it seems there’s always something else to do. My husband encourages me to take some ‘down time’, but I often say “I’m just too busy.”

But busy doing what? All I do is work full time and tend a small apartment. That takes a lot of time, but should it really take all my time? Should I really have no time in my week to invest in other things?

Prompted by these circumstances, I ended up making a list of things that would streamline my housework and free up more time to do other things.

1. Maintain, don’t clean. If I maintain my home, I never have to clean it. A little work every day saves me from a whole Saturday full of chores that have been building all week. For example, if I make sure the clothes always make it to the hamper (instead of throwing them on the floor), and that the hamper is never overflowing, I don’t have mountains of laundry to deal with on my free days.
2. Tools. I’ve come to see that specialized kitchen and cleaning tools are just like any other tool other professionals use to do their jobs. Some items are overpriced and gimmicky, but not all. I’ve come to realize it isn’t silly to have the best tools for the job – its wisdom. I want to be purposeful to build a supply of helpful (not extravagant) tools that will serve me and my family.
3. Consistency. A little work every day saves me from a weekend full of work. Fifteen minutes in the morning each day adds up to over an hour come the weekend.
4. Help. Because I wanted to say “look what I did all by myself!” I used to pridefully fight off my husbands attempts to help with housework. It’s helpful when he reminds me that in reality, he has to take responsibility for how our home is managed before the Lord, since he is head of our family. Caring for the home is just an area where God has gifted women to help their husbands. It isn’t ‘off limits’ to him. I need to humbly accept my husband’s willing help when he can offer it, and be sure to express my gratitude to him.
5. Trust God. I probably won’t accomplish everything, no matter how regimented I am. I need to trust God with the things that don’t get done. And when my schedule goes perfectly and I finish every task with time to spare, I need to be wary not to begin trusting myself and my abilities – I must be trusting God then too. Scripture warns us that pride comes before we fall. If I want to persist in caring for my home, it will only be by God’s grace that I can do it. I need to acknowledge that to him and thank him.
   
   

'Now'

Before another second of 'now' escapes me:

Baba and Omi: I love you guys and thank God that you're my parents. I know you've always done your best to act in my best interest. Thank you for teaching me to fear the Lord - you could have done me no greater service to equip me for adult live.

Yosh: I LOVE YOU MAN!! I'm sorry I don't purpose to call you more. I'm so proud of you for graduating and now working, and for desiring to know God's will for your life. You're the best bigger-little brother in the world! I thank God for you!

Reese: chill out.

Tom and Becky: I love you both - I couldn't have asked for better parents-in-law. I haven't had the nightmares of social stereotypes with you. Thank you for your wonderful son, the best husband in the world. I thank God for you.

Chris and Liz: You guys are awesome siblings-in-law. I thoroughly enjoyed our outing the night before Thanksgiving...well, everything but the surprise shrimp-stock. Thanks for planning so diligently. Your company is always hilarious and enjoyable. Hopefully we'll make it to Japan as a foursome one day soon. I thank God for both of you.

Molly: NO!

and most importantly, Stephan:

"Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband." --Ephesians 5:25-33

This has been your creed since day one. Thank you. Under my salvation, you are the most precious gift I've been given. Thank you for being so patient and loving as I've grown in respecting you. I thank God for you every day.

As for my friends, I'll send out emails. You are many and I am blessed.

Stay Awake

"But concerning that day or that hour, no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. Be on guard, keep awake. For you do not know when the time will come. It is like a man going on a journey, when he leaves home and puts his servants in charge, each with his work, and commands the doorkeeper to stay awake. Therefore stay awake--for you do not know when the master of the house will come, in the evening, or at midnight, or when the cock crows, or in the morning-- lest he come suddenly and find you asleep. And what I say to you I say to all: Stay awake." --Mark 13:32-37

My great grandmother died yesterday morning.

Granny Anne is what I always called her. I don't know her real name. I don't even know how she was related to me exactly. But she was always Granny.

My dad called me two nights ago to tell me he and my mom were on their way to the hospital to be with her. At 7 am yesterday he called again to tell me Granny had died.

The load of bricks fell when I reached for my keys to go to work. Granny was dead. I'd never see her again. I called the office to tell them I'd be late and took the morning to sort myself out.

I went and saw my husband at work, and he did was he usually does when I can't decipher my feelings: he points me back to the gospel and to God. He suggested that I pray for peace for my family and understanding for myself. And as I prayed for clarity, it came:

I hadn't really believed that Granny would die. She'd outlived four different husbands, for crying out loud! Everything about her was strong and steady.

But she wasn't invincible to the human condition.

Then the regret hit me. I hadn't heard all the stories. I hadn't sat at her feet and learned from her. I hadn't called her on her birthday. I hadn't taken opporutnies to see her. I hadn't thanked her for loving the Lord. I hadn't sown into her life, so I hadn't reaped anything. I hadn't...I hadn't...I hadn't...

I had fallen asleep. The hour had come for Granny, like a theif in the night. She was gone.

I had missed my chance with her, but there were other people who's lives I could sow into, right? But it was so hard...I was fortunate if I got one night a week with my own husband! I could only talk to either set of my parents but once a week these days, if that. I didn't keep in touch with my own brother or my brother and sister-in-law as much as I wanted. And friends? The occasional email was all I could manage...

Would they all die before I could contribute meaningfully to their lives and let them contribute to mine?

Stephan listened to all this patiently, then started asking questions. "Are you remembering the Gospel?" "Are you thanking God that he is soveriegn and his will is perfect?" "Do you realize that you aren't God, and being finite you can only accomplish a finite number of things, including sow into a finite number of people's lives?"

His questions are always helpful. His last was especially so. Only God can accomplish the infinite. I am finite. God understands this, and would only call me to perform a finite number of tasks. That being the case, I need to pay careful attetion to how God has ordered my relationships and prioritize the people he has placed in positions of priority. This, of course, is my husband first and formost. Next would be my family. After that would come friends, and within this group I need to pray for wisdom to know which relationships to pursue the hardest. And for those friendships I can't pursue as hard right now, I need to trust God to sustain them until I have more to give.

And beyond that - I need to do it now. I don't know when the master is coming home - I need to stay awake! I'm not garaunteed a 'later'. 'Now' is my only option if I'm going to do it. I can't 'fall asleep'. I need to be busy with the tasks my master left me when he departed - one of them being to love my neighbor.

Stephan said something very exciting in reference to my grandmother yesterday. "I remember the last time we visited Granny said she was ready to go. She wanted to be home with her savior. She died without pain, surrounded by people who loved her and who were reading scripture to her right up until the very end. Her last hours were probably some of the most exciting of her life! Grieve for yourself, but not for her."

Let me encourage you to think of how God has ordered your relationships and consider if you're sowing into them in a way that will reap good fruit later. The greatest service you can do for others is to encourage them to hate their sin more and love their Savior more. This may look like encouragment, correction, teaching, learning, or even evangelism. Bring the gospel to every circumstance - you'll either stregnthen a christian, or speak the only message that can save an unbeleiver. We're all heading for either the most exciting or most dreadfully horrible hours of our lives, depending on our relationship with Christ. Encourage others to sow to righteousness as much as possible before they arrive there, so they can face death with peace and confidence of hope beyond the grave.

How sick I really am

I was told yesterday I had developed the “look of the chronically ill”. The generic meds obviously weren't working. I called my doctor.

When I went to pick up the correct medication, the pharmacist said that I wasn’t scheduled to get a refill until the 21st. I told her what had happened, and she explained that my insurance didn’t take those circumstances into account – they only contributed to the price once a month. As far as they were concerned, I shouldn’t be refilling my medication yet. I asked what I’d have to do to get the medication now. She said “pay out of pocket.”

The prices of other people’s medications I’d heard while waiting flashed in my head. $72. $76. $84. $60. I asked how much it would be out of pocket. $19 was her reply. I paid and left.

I realized as I walked home that I would have been willing to pay much more than I did to take that medication home immediately. I was surprised at how much it had become worth to me in the days I’ve been ill. I wanted to be fixed.

I became aware over the past weeks of how sick I really am. I was taken down deeper into my disease than I’ve ever been. I’ve seen how badly I really do need help – something outside myself, to come in and ‘fix me’. No amount of my willpower or effort makes it go away. I can’t cure myself.

Sin is a lot like that too: It affects every area of my life, I can’t fix it myself through my own effort, and I need outside help. The good news is that there’s a “medication” for it though – the Gospel! And there’s insurance that will pay for it in full, costing us nothing out of pocket – God’s love. And it only takes one dose to be saved from the death this disease brings. We still need regular doses of grace to fight its affects while we live, but we aren’t going to die from it! And we aren’t told that because we’ve already had a refill this month, we have to pay full price for it – it’s abundant and free!

So I ask myself: am I aware of how sick I really am? Do I understand the severity of my sin? Do I know that I can’t fix my sin through my own effort and acknowledge that I need Jesus and his sacrifice to save me from death? Do I long after God and his grace with the same intensity that I long after my medication when I’m feeling the effects of my sickness? Am I as troubled when I miss a dose of time with God as I am when I miss a dose of medication? Do I see danger in that, just as I see danger in missing my medication? Do I daily appreciate the fact that his grace is free and abundant? Do I tell God I appreciate it regularly?

Not always – and shame on me. I can say confidently that after having experienced it for even a short amount of time, I can’t imagine life without being on the medicine of God’s grace. I am completely dependent on it to get me through without feeling the effects of my disease – sin. Given this, I should be much more thankful, especially since this treatment regimen is completely free. The Gospel has saved me from greater peril than my physical medication has – I should have a much less complacent attitude about this wonderful gift!

But now a righteousness from God, apart from law, has been made known, to which the Law and the Prophets testify. This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood. He did this to demonstrate his justice, because in his forbearance he had left the sins committed beforehand unpunished— he did it to demonstrate his justice at the present time, so as to be just and the one who justifies those who have faith in Jesus. Where, then, is boasting? It is excluded. On what principle? On that of observing the law? No, but on that of faith. For we maintain that a man is justified by faith apart from observing the law. --Romans 3:21-28

Psalm 25

The past couple days have been tough. This Psalm refreshed my soul this morning. I've italicized passages that particularly affected me.

Psalm 25

Teach Me Your Paths

Of David.

To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul. O my God, in you I trust; let me not be put to shame; let not my enemies exult over me. Indeed, none who wait for you shall be put to shame; they shall be ashamed who are wantonly treacherous.

Make me to know your ways, O LORD; teach me your paths. Lead me in your truth and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; for you I wait all the day long.

Remember your mercy, O LORD, and your steadfast love, for they have been from of old. Remember not the sins of my youth or my transgressions; according to your steadfast love remember me, for the sake of your goodness, O LORD!

Good and upright is the LORD; therefore he instructs sinners in the way. He leads the humble in what is right, and teaches the humble his way. All the paths of the LORD are steadfast love and faithfulness, for those who keep his covenant and his testimonies.

For your name's sake, O LORD, pardon my guilt, for it is great. Who is the man who fears the LORD? Him will he instruct in the way that he should choose. His soul shall abide in well-being, and his offspring shall inherit the land. The friendship of he LORD is for those who fear him, and he makes known to them his covenant. My eyes are ever toward the LORD, for he will pluck my feet out of the net.

Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. The troubles of my heart are enlarged; bring me out of my distresses. Consider my affliction and my trouble, and forgive all my sins.

Consider how many are my foes, and with what violent hatred they hate me. Oh, guard my soul, and deliver me! Let me not be put to shame, for I take refuge in you. May integrity and uprightness preserve me, for I wait for you.

Redeem Israel, O God, out of all his troubles.

I love verse 10: "All the paths of the LORD are steadfast love and faithfulness, for those who keep his covenant and his testimonies. " What a promise! What a buoy for a hard day!

Fight it!

Yesterday I was sitting on the couch looking at a cookbook when temptation presented itself. I threw my head back against the sofa and growled outloud in frustration - "God, this is hard! I don't want to fight sin anymore! I'm weary!"

Ever feel like some days you're just under attack from all fronts?

I sure do. The queue of temptations seems to reach back over the hills, and they never stop presenting themselves. I'm in a weakened physical state as well, which only makes mental and habitual discipline harder. My husband's been away from home more than normal, leaving me alone with my thoughts. What does one do in these situations? Here's what I'm trying to do. I don't always get it right and I fail often, but not always - by God's grace!

1. Be honest about needing help. I never honestly and humbly recieve help unless I've admitted to myself that need it. I must be honest about my sinful state, and admit that it will disable any solo attempt I make to glorify the Lord.
2. Cry out. I must seek help from the Lord. I must pray to him, crying out for his help, because I am too weak to battle my sin on my own. Any attempt to glorify him will fail without his grace. I have to remember the veil's been torn in two - I can access God anywhere! Wherever temptation presents itself, I can pray.
3. Draw others in. I must seek help from other mature Christians. I must humbly confess my sin to them and ask for their input into the situation. They'll be able to see things I can't. I also need accountability - I need to share specific questions they can ask me over time and speicific ways they can pray for me.
4. Meditate on the Gospel. One of the most effective things I can do! I must ask that God press the Gospel deep into my heart. With this perspective, sinning will seem such a silly choice against the backdrop of His ultimate expression of love for me.
5. Don't let my mind idle!! This is by far the toughest part of the battle for me. I find I can't allow my mind any unoccupied time. I must decide that I'm going to set my mind on things above. I've purposed to make a habit of never letting my mind sit in silence. Praise music is very helpful, and can play while I'm doing any task. Lists of prayer requests are helpful, because then I'm never without something to pray for. From my desk to the bathroom is enough time for me to pray for the unsaved in my life. And of course, if my mind and hands are idle, I've got enough time to have a quiet time and read the Bible. Keeping God's promises close at hand is a helpful weapon against sin. Memorized scripture is also irreplaceable. God-centered books are also helpful to have on hand when I have free time.

As I persist in these disciplines, I find they become easier and more involentary. Instead of singing hip christmas songs (which are impossible to escape this time of year), I'm whistling "Beautiful Savior" before I realize it.

I didn't give in to the temptation presented while I was on the couch. I jumped for my Bible and cried out to God for help. And he's faithful to deliever. I may be weary, but God's at work in me, and he'll complete that work!

"...he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." --Phil 1:6

Our Wedding!

Angelfire has forgiven me:

www.angelfire.com/rings/stephanandkari

(ps. The page is titled 'the Faes' - this is my shortened version of my last name, Faherty. I do this because 1) it's shorter and 2) it makes it verbally easier for me to distinguish my nuclear family from that of my parents in law - so when it says "Dinner at the Faherty's" on the calendar, I know where I'm eating!)

Charmed November

Breakfast on an open deck
Early in the month September
Take a bite – pause to reflect
On the quick-coming November

When the leaves will all turn pale
Surrender emerald tints of old
Grips on branches all will fail
At the steady kiss of cold

When the air will ring with lights
When the woods are more inviting
When the moon will seem more bright
When the weather is just deciding

What its temperature will be
And puts on its cloak of chill
Prompting more time spent in sleeves
And leaning against windowsills

People smile with elfin grins
Blessings are much more expected
People breathe in earthy winds
And now the fall is full detected

Open books ‘neath open eyes
Leaning against the trunk of trees
Looking up at cloud grey skies
While whispers sing in silver breeze

All the world looks pale and dull
Everything looks washed out grey
Everything looks just half full –
And I’d have it no other way

Soon that time is drawing nigh
When colors all resemble ember-
Here I watch the autumn sky
And haste your coming charmed November

Dependence

About a year ago I started experiencing fairly severe fatigue and was inable to stay warm. My mom was convinced I was anemic. I was convinced I just needed to move to the west coast - it was much easier to solve than being anemic. My husband finally convinced me to go to the doctor. I wasn't anemic - but I did have a thyroid disorder.

This is nothing big, nor surprising. Several members of my family have thyroid disorders. Mine is not uncommon: hypothyroidism. Basically my body's engine doesn't rev hard enough. Just like a car won't go very fast or get very warm when the engine isn't working at full capacity, my body experiences similar symptoms because my thyroid doesn't work at full capacity. I'm tired, weary, and cold a large percent of the time - if I don't take my medicine.

Well, I've had my medicine and have taken it faithfully for 5 months. For the first 3 months I felt great. The past 2 months however, I've felt myself winding down again. The only thing I can think of is that my doctor ordered me the generic medication instead of the name-brand one last time she called in my perscription to the pharmacy. I'm going to ask her to stick with the name-brand the next time around and see if there's a difference. If there is, the problem is solved.

In the meantime, God is good. The past few days I've felt completely unmotivated. All I've wanted to do is sleep (typical of my disorder). Cleaning my house is a major undertaking. And having a quiet time? Out of the question - if I'm depending on myself.

"I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing." -John 15:5

Jesus reminds us in this passage that we can't accomplish anything of eternal value unless we're continually abiding in him. God's reminded me how frail and weak I really am without Him, how little good I can do for His kingdom without his help. My body fails me daily. I am a limited being. But God is unlimited, and he has promised to stregnthen me to obey him. Thus, even though I feel like my battery's about to die and I'll involentarily switch off at any moment, I can pray with the confidence and dependence of the Psalmist:

"Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory. Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." -Psalm 73:23-26

Field of Flowers

Am I writing too much? I suppose no one's obligated to read it =)

Tuesday night I learned a good friend of mine is pregnant! I was so excited for her and her husband, but something like a fog settled over me when I heard this news. I couldn't decipher it. My husband couldn't decipher it. I told him I felt like I was being stalked, like something was waiting for me to turn around, then it would pounce. If I just looked straight ahead with my eyes on the cross, I'd be ok - but if I took my eyes off the cross, this thing would...well...'get me.' At this point Stephan did what he always does when he realizes he can help no more - he suggests that I go to God, because God knows even if neither of us do. He suggested that I let him finish dinner and I go have my quiet time for the day.

In the first chapter of Romans I read where Paul writes of man "exchanging the truth of God for a lie" and set up idols for themselves. I didn't see it pertaining to my present unease, but I asked myself anyway: What things am I tempted to idolize?

One answer (I had a few) was "I'm tempted to idolize a different season of life". I can be tempted often to wish my life circumstances were different, and live for that - pursue that - instead of living for and pursuing God. I desire to stop working and be home fulltime. Learning about my friends pregnancy made me realize that she is headed for the very season of life I long for - one without work concentrated in the home. This stirred up my old idol, and if I hadn't been keeping God's promises close at hand, it would have consumed we quickly. Stephan was right - God knew what was going on in my heart.

As I thought about this, a picture crossed my mind. It was myself, running full tilt through a beautiful field of wild flowers, of all heights and colors. Beautiful mountains towered over head, and grand forrests could be seen at their foothills. Anyone who knows me well knows that this is my ideal of beauty. Grandeous, untouched nature is where I long to spend my time. I am a cabin-in-the-woods girl. And I was pelting through this without giving it the time of day. What was wrong with me?

God was asking a question: why run through a field of flowers? Why run through the season of life you're in right now? It's beautiful! It's good! There's much to be learned here. I need to enjoy it while I can, use it to prepare for the future. I'll never pass through this time of life again. I'll never be back in this field of flowers.

Scripture is clear that we shouldn't be preoccupied with tomorrow, but with today (Matthew 6:34, James 4:14-16). And what a beautiful place today is! Slow down and walk, tarry, glean, learn, prepare.

Judgment

"Therefore you have no excuse, O man, every one of you who judges. For in passing judgment on another you condemn yourself, because you, the judge, practice the very same things." -Romans 2:1

When I fold laundry, I always take extra special care to make sure my husband's clothes are right-side-out. I do this because I think to myself "Stephan is apt to put his clothes on inside-out if they're folded in the drawer that way." I don't take this same care with my own clothes.

So yesterday Stephan left for work much earlier than I, and I got ready alone in the house, then left for work with my big poofy coat on. At 2 in the afternoon, I chanced to touch the edge of my shirt sleeve - and felt a seam. Looking down, I saw that my shirt was inside out. This was a shirt with threaded embroidery on the front, so behind the embroidery was that dryer-sheet looking material. I'd been walking around all day with a dryer sheet sewed to my chest and my Old Navy tags sticking out perpendicular to my neck! I went to the bathroom and flipped my shirt. Minutes later my boss asked me how I was doing. I asked if he'd noticed that my shirt had been on inside-out all day and just didn't tell me so. He told me no, he hadn't noticed - then laughed uproariously.

It's not only with clothes that this is my experience though. How often I get irritated with people's self-centeredness, only to turn around and act self-centered, or offended by others' prideful attitude only to whip around and be prideful myself. This is why scripture urges us to examine ourselves first before we point the finger at others - because chances are we're doing the same things, provoking the same irritated responses from others.

"Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye." -Matthew 7:1-5

Jesus wasn't bashful with presenting reality here. It's a comical yet helpful picture, a person walking around with a log sticking out of their eye. It's almost like the cartoon character carrying the ladder over his shoulder when someone comes up behind him and calls his name. With a "What?" the character spins around and the ladder knocks his friend in the head! And the cartoon character has no idea how foolish he looks in his oblivion, or how distructive he's being.

This, of course, is a hard thing to master. I'm much more apt to think uncharitably about others than be honest about my own sin. It's helpful to picture how ridiculous it is for a person, who's vision is completely obstructed by a log in their eye, to go up to others who only have a little speck in their's and offer to help them remove it. We're equally as foolish when we become judgmental against another person's sin, because in most cases we've committed that same sin ourselves.

Putting my shirt on inside out taught me a good lesson with broad reaching application. I'll be folding both me and Stephan's clothes with special care - and try my darndest to be conscious of my own log.

My Wedding - or not...

Just got an email telling me the link to the wedding site wasn't working, and sure enough, when I tried the link myself I was told I was violating angelfire's terms of service (which I must have done sometime in my sleep last night, because yesterday I was a member in good enough standing to make major modifications...)

I think this is what happened:

"If you upload too many photos without building web pages on which to display them, the system may assume that you are simply storing files" (Lycos terms of service)

Which apparently is a big no-no. I'll replace the link if angelfire ever forgives me.