Before I get too deep into this post, everyone should read The Count of Monte Cristo.
I ride the bus to work. I pick one spot at the bustop and I always wait there. I figure God is sovereign over where the bus pulls up alot the curb. There's usually plenty of seats for all of us.
One day a few weeks ago the bus pulled up right in front of me. Everyone shifted to await the opening doors. There were some people ahead of me since I usually stand back from the curb. Then from my right a woman began pushing very forcefully and rudely slipping herself between people to force her way to the head of the line. A blond woman next to me began some commentary. "Whoa, geez! Take it easy! It's not like he's going to leave you behind!" I dropped my eyes. She said exactly what I was thinking, only I added "Hmph! I never do anything that rude...".
On the way home there's another phenomenon that illicited the same kind of 'good grief!' reaction from me. When we're approaching the final discharge spot (that's the bustop where everyone has to get off or they're going to make the loop again) some people will get up out of their seat a half mile from the stop and just stand in front of the door. Here's my mental reaction: "Why do people do that? I can somewhat understand pushing to the head of the line when you're boarding the bus to get a seat, but when you're exiting? It's like they think all the seats in their car are going to be taken when they get there! What makes them think they're so much better than the rest of us that they should be first off the bus?" and then there it was again: "Hmph! I never do that."
Well, my sin-detector (you know, the holy spirit) went off one morning while I was having these thoughts. "A little self-righteous, aren't we?" it asked. I thought about it. Yes, it seemed so. Scripture calls us to a high standard in this area. Philipians 2:3 says "Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. " We aren't to think of ourselves as better than others - so I'm not to think that someone is worse than me because they do something I wouldn't, like push to the head of the bus line or wait at the door.
Jesus condemns this elevated view of self in a parable he told.
"Now he told a parable to those who were invited, when he noticed how they chose the places of honor, saying to them, "When you are invited by someone to a wedding feast, do not sit down in a place of honor, lest someone more distinguished than you be invited by him, and he who invited you both will come and say to you, 'Give your place to this person,' and then you will begin with shame to take the lowest place. But when you are invited, go and sit in the lowest place, so that when your host comes he may say to you, 'Friend, move up higher.' Then you will be honored in the presence of all who sit at table with you. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted." --Luke 14:7-11
It's easy to see from this parable that we're always to go into the feast with the assumption that all other guests are more important than ourselves. There's never a reason to think we're better than the next guy - even if the next guy is shoving his way to the head of the bus line. What's the difference between him and me really? Could his pushing be an expression of him thinking he's better than the rest of us and deserves to board first? Is that any different than me thinking I'm better than him because I don't do that? Looks like we're both suffering from an elevated view of self and a diminuative view of others.
The bus queue isn't the only place in my life where self-righteousness manifests. Every time I see that my husband has put the garlic press in the crock instead of the drawer I think "why does he keep doing this! I never do this, I get it right!" I'm being self-righteous. When I get cranky at the guy who pushes all the way to the front of the merge lane on the interstate instead of just taking an earlier opening and think "Why do people do that? Don't they know they're making traffic worse by doing that? I never do that," I'm being self righteous. I could go on like this forever.
Perhaps you're thinking it's not wrong to expect people to 'act properly' or 'get it right'. Well, I think if I search my heart what I'm really saying with statements like this is I want them to do it the way I would do it. And in that, I'm definitely using myself as the ultimate standard of correctness. And so...I'm the best! Or that's what I'm believing in my heart, and that's what's coming out in my actions.
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