Ken's mermaid

There's a guy round the corner who drinks his coffee out of a cup with Ariel from Disney's The Little Mermaid on it. Whenever I see it outside his lab I smile. "The illusive mermaid," I think, "Ken's holy grail..."

He scuba dives. He went to Bonaire this month for two weeks. Before he left I asked, as always, "do you think you'll find her this time?" He always gives a hopeful answer, but every time comes back without having met with any undersea company.

When I first saw him upon his return I cried out "You're back! I'm so relieved you weren't eaten by mermaids!" After chuckling he cried out "Oh, I got a picture of a mermaid this time!" I raised an eyebrown and cocked my head sceptically. "No really! I saw one!" he persisted. I asked if said mermaid would be in with the pictures he took on his trip and he assured me she would be.

Days went by. No pictures materialized. I began ribbing him in the hallways when I passed him, saying he was pulling my leg. He was steadfast in belief though, and smuggly but smilingly told me I'd soon see.

Well, today the pictures were on my desk on a CD. I popped it in and scrolled through. They're amazing photographs. Ken's a superb photographer. There were blowfish and baby trumpet fish, christmas tree coral and sea slugs, sea horses and shrimps - and eels. He loves eels. And then, there she was. Ken's mermaid! She was beautiful with sprite-like features and an hourglass figure. Her tail was bright green and her hair baby blue, and there was even a little blue sea star in the center of her forhead. And then...wait, there was a giant thumb and fore finger pinching her perfectly shaped fins...hold it.

Yeah, it was a toy held up by one of Ken's diving buddies. I smiled. I'd suspected as much. At least it wasn't one of his male diving cohorts in a bikini...

But looking through the other photos, another ghostly figure caught my eye. I studied the picture closer and Ken's toy suddenly wasn't the only mermaiden hidden in his photos. This one was nestled snugly inside an opening in a shipwreck, her head gracefully bent to one side, her hands peacefully touching. Her skin was porcelain white and her head was draped with a thin shawl of the same color. Her sleaves were long. Her eyes were kind. Her presence was ethreal and lent an air of mystery to the indigo and teal scene - and isn't that what mermaids are fabled to do? I smiled.

Looks like Ken found his mermaid after all. Iwonder if he even noticed.

Joel

I was recently introduced to the world of MySpace by on of my best friends in the whole wide world (I love you Tapa!!). Well, in that cyper labrinth one thing can lead to another and I found a MySpace for my old youth pastor Joel. Apparently alot's been going on in his life. I stumbled across a music page he's put up (he's a great musician).

Anyway, he's got some of his music up on his MySpace, and the one that was playing brought me so much joy. He wrote a song for his wife, Danielle, called "My brown-eyed black haired brown skinned girl." Kinda long, yeah, but when you know something about his family you just laugh with joy. See, Joel's about as white as people come. He's the "blue-eyed, brown-haired pale skinned dad" in the song. The woman discribed in the title is Danielle, his wife - her mother is white like Joel, but her dad is African American. You can see where her attributes come from. She's beautiful. Then there's their first child, Zack, he's a "brown eyed brown haired brown skinned boy" who looks alot like his mom. After him comes Melody, a "green-eyed brown-haired pale skinned girl". They're a beautiful family who love Jesus with all their souls. It's a rare and wonderful thing these days.

So where was I going with this? Oh right - the song. Go hear it.

Reality invades soccer

So...did anyone watch the world cup final?

Ok ok, forget an intro for this post. We all know what happened. It was Italy and France playing for the cup, and both teams fought so hard that it was still 1 all after 3 hours of play. During those rigorous 3 hours the French team captain, Zinedine Zidane incurred a bad injury to his right shoulder, but kept playing. We could all see he was hurting, but he handled it extraordinarily well, in my opinion. Later he missed a penalty kick. It was easy to see he was growing tired, weary and angry as he let out a wordless scream toward the French goal he'd missed by mere centimeters. As the game wore on, I'm sure I wasn't the only one chewing holes in the plastic plate my lunch had been on.

A bit of background on the man of the hour. Zinedine Zidane was born to Algerian immigrants in a poor part of Marseille. He's a real Oliver Twist. He'd retired but had come back to play for this year's World Cup, and he would retire again after this game's finish. He's France's hero. He's famed for his ability to perform at penalty kicks. As it became clear that the game was heading for penalty kicks, there was no question the Captain was under a little pressure.

Then then entire focus of the game shifted as an Italian player named Materazzi came up to Zidane (who speaks Italian) and made a comment that is as of yet unconfirmed. Zidane turned around and rammed his head into Materazzi's chest, laying him flat on his back. My jaw fell open as I watched the ref run up to Zidane and hold the infamous red card aloft. Zidane didn't seem to give much resistance as he left the field. The short remainder of the game was clouded by the incident. Italy won in penalty kicks, but what would have happened if Zidane had kicked for France? And what did Materazzi say that provoked such a response from a man who's composure and endurance I'd been admiring the whole game? What posessed Zidane to make him willing to end his glittering career on that note?

Well, there's alot of speculation. Some pretty impressive measures have been taken. FIFA brought in a deaf lip reader to pronounce Materazzi's Italian words for a listening Italian translator. I won't repeat what they deciphered, but it was something to do with Zidane being a terrorist and unkind words were mentioned about his mother.

I know, I laughed a little too - but this was no typical yo moma joke. It was awful, especially given Zidane's Algerian heritage and the current tensions both in the global threat of terrorism and the racism flaring up in France.

But none of that is confirmed. Zidane had promised to reveal the comment, but has reserved for himself a few days of media privacy. I don't blame him.

So we're all left wondering what happened. ...well, are we really? I think it's pretty clear.
The shoulder injury. Missing the penalty kick. Playing hard for 3 hours. Awful, awful comments. Zidane was squeezed and something came out. What came out was an explosion of anger. What came out was sin.

Here I must interject that my heart broke for him in that moment. Strange at it seems, I've actually be praying for Zidane since this incident. When I saw him headbutt Materazzi, I forgot all about soccer and the blunt reality of the fallen world I live in invaded the world cup: Zidane wasn't just a soccer player. He was a sinner who needed a savior - he just proved it.

Anxious though I am to know exactly what Materazzi said, the most horrible words won't justify Zidane's brief moment of rage. Fits of anger are clearly listed among sinful actions in scripture, and the penalty of those sins is worse than a red card - it's death.

You see, all people are sinners - meaning we rebel against God's rules for our life and opt for our own rules. If God is to remain just, he can't let that rebellion go unpunished. But being a loving God, he sent Jesus - who had no sin of his own to die for - to die for ours in our place. God raised him from the dead because he had died a death he didn't deserve. Once that happened, God gives us the option of a swap - our complete sinfulness for Jesus' complete righteousness. If we admit in our heart that we are sinners, and that we will never be perfect on our own and need someone to do it for us, and accept Christ's death in our place so as attain his perfection in God's eyes, then we not only have the promise of eternity with God, but grace immediately active in our hearts to help us turn from our sin and lead a life pleasing to God.

The bad news is anyone who doesn't do this not only lives without God in this life, but also in the next life. The sad truth of rejecting Christ is hell. This is the just punishment for our rebellion against God. I don't mean to scare anyone with talk of hell - and I certainly don't mean to insinuate that Zidane is going to hell because he headbutted another player. A thousand times no! If anyone goes to hell it has nothing to do with the sum total of our behavior during our life - whether we go to heaven or hell is decided by whether or not we realize our sin and turn to Christ for help, accepting his death on our behalf and his grace to renounce our sin and turn from it. This is the only deciding factor - it has nothing to do with headbutting or cigarette butting or butting in line. We are all born with sin, and thus all heading toward hell. There's nothing especially bad about Zidane - every person on the planet is in the same boat. We've all got a big problem, and there's a fix for it if we're willing to turn from our rebellion, accept Christ's death for us, and live by God's rules.

Like I said, I've been praying for Zidane. When I see high profile displays of sin like this I'm reminded that I'm no different. I have the potential for headbutting someone who says nasty things to me after a long day at work. I have the potential for far worse things! If I'm any more like Jesus than anyone else, that's completely God's work in me. I couldn't have worked that change on my own. So even though I can know that Zidane's behavior was wrong based on scripture, I don't judge him. I'm a sinner too. Thank God there's a savior for any who call on him!

The best headline I could imagine coming out of this dramatic game would be that Zidane would realize his need for a savior. But in my oppinion is that anyone coming to Christ is worthy of headlines.

Oh, and for the record - I don't want it to seem like I'm letting Materazzi off the hook. As his words are still unconfirmed, I won't comment on them. But if it's as bad as people are speculating, he evidenced his need for a savior too - and a headline saying that he recognized his need for a savior would be just as great.

Maintenance

I finished Philippians the other day and started Colossians.

As I started reading this new book of the bible, I was greeted with this passage:

"And so, from the day we heard, we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that
you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and
understanding, so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to
him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God.
May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all
endurance and patience with joy, giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified
you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. He has delivered us from
the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, in
whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins." --Col 1:9-14

Aw, how nice. It is a very pretty prayer for a pastor to pray for his congregation. But I was struck by the implications of this prayer. First, Paul prays that the Colossians would have wisdom to know God's will, and thus could walk in a way that pleased him in everything, and eventually know him more. Second he prays that they'd have the stregnth to endure anything with patience and joy, giving thanks to the God who saved their souls from hell. Then, as he's always faithful to do, he throws in the Gospel by way of reminder.

Pause over this for a moment. Know God's will. Please him in everything. Know him more. Endure all circumstances with patience and joy. Give thanks no matter what for the Gospel. These are wonderful aspirations! I want these things for my own life. I was so affected by how well-rounded this prayer was in attacking many of the root problems of our sin and pointing us back to the God who saved us that I decided to pray it for myself every day. If I could mantain the major points of this prayer in my life, I would see alot of fruit. I need to be specific in my prayers in battling my sin also, but this is a great all-around prayer. This is a wonderful maintenance prayer for the christian life.

Funny Doctor Story #5

I had done the paperwork and arrangements for Dr. Freakout to go to Seattle for a conference a couple months ago. In late June he left for said conference. Yesterday he was back to work.

Given that I had done the paperwork for his trip, I knew that he'd be taking a couple days of leave after the conference to go to Olypic National Park. So when I saw him, forget the RNA Society, forget his plane ride, I called down the hall "How was Olypic?"

He invited me into his office and told me about his trip. One of the things he mentioned was a trail he'd hiked that led to the largest Yellow Cedar tree in the country.

"I find though," he said, gesticulating to the cedar's location on the PDF map on his monitor, "that these old cedar trees are not that interesting."

"But they've got to be huge," I said.

"Huge yes," he said, matter of factly, "But they look like they're dying. If you contrast them with the giant Redwoods in northern california, they look decrepit. The Redwoods actually look like their having a happy life."

I chuckled at his personification of the trees as we pursued the topic further. "This cedar," he said, flicking toward the monitor again, "will live, but it looks miserable. The Redwoods look jovial and the only thing that I've heard will kill them is if they fall over."

My brain did a quick scan of the possible inducements that could knock down one of those trees. Wind? Too-soft earth? A very committed and tenacious beaver? None seemed very likely in California. "What would knock those mammoth's down?" I asked.

"Well, they don't put their roots down very low."

I couldn't resist. "Pretty dumb trees," I said.

He looked at me like it was the weirdest thing in the world to personify a tree. "What?" he said.

"Well they grow to be so top heavy and yet they don't put down deep roots."

"But they're magnificent," he countered.

"Magnificent maybe," I offered, "but daft."

He shrugged his shoulders in his classic way and we went on to talk about the Grand Canyon.

Worry

I think I mentioned yesterday that I was worried for my future when I considered my thyroid disease. Well, I went home and had my quiet time and was met with this:

"Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me--practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you." --Phil :4-9

Wow. Didn't I also say yesterday that I wished I could get my truth administered intraveinously? Here's my antiodote injection. God really spoke to me through this passage.

First is a small evidence of a biblical theme: "rejoice in the Lord always." Elsewhere scripture says to rejoice in trials and count sufferings joy. When we face affliction in life, even then we should be rejoicing - but in what? In the Lord. Then Paul implores us to let our "reasonableness be known to everyone". This 'reasonableness' is forebearance, or patiently bearing up under a given circumstance. We're to endure.

Now here was gold: "be anxious about nothing." The bible doesn't throw in these all exclusive statements by accident. When it says to be anxious about nothing, it means nothing. But scripture rarely tells us not to do something without giving us something we should do instead. Instead of being axious, we're to pray and make our requests known to God against the backdrop of thanksgiving. We're not to approach God with an angry, bitter heart, demanding change, but to humbly come to him and thank him for his goodness, even in the midst of trial, and though we make our preference known to him, be ready to accept his soveriegn will.

Now, what's the incentive for this? "And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." We're not to worry, but we're to pray and depend on God, and when we do so, we'll recieve God's peace. God's peace! Peace is the antithesis of worry. God has given us an escape hatch from worry - trust in him. By praying we're expressing our dependence on him, and to do that honestly we have to develop a genuine trust in his character. We have to come to a place where we believe he loves us and will take care of us. When we have this, we will have God's peace. It does indeed surpass all understanding.

But that's not all. The passage goes on to arm us further in our fight against worry. We're to focus our thoughts on anything that is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, and worthy of praise - instaed of letting the object of our worry consume our minds. If we do this and practice godliness, "The God of peace will be with us". It's worth it to focus my thoughts away from the object of my worry and onto all things good and godly, because the God of peace will be with us. In my mind, that's good company.

Weakness

I'm sick again.

Sometimes I feel like I'll never be well. I totally dispair for my future. I didn't get up to have my quiet time this morning - and I don't know if I'll be awake enough to have one when I get home.

At times like these I need a quick hit of truth. Here was my choice this morning:

"Why do you say, O Jacob, and speak, O Israel,"My way is hidden from the LORD, and my right is disregarded by my God"? Have you not known? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint." --Isaiah 40:27-31

boy, I almost wish I could take the stuff intravenously. What a promise. And though it's miserable being sick, this promise is made all the sweeter because of my illness. If I were strong and healthy, I probably wouldn't give promises like this the time of day. I'd think that it was certainly a beautiful thought, but I would - if I were honest with myself - believe I didn't need such promises.

I thank God for this illness. It's making me see just how much I need him. And the truth is I wouldn't need him any less if I were perfectly healthy - I'd just be more susceptible to the deception that I was self sufficient. I'm glad for these circumstances breaking down that lie in my mind. And hopefully, if God sees it fit to heal me of this disorder, I'll be able to hold on to the truth that I need God for my stregth even when I'm healthy.

Freedom

How was your 4th? Good I hope. Mine was nice. I started out with a rigorous hike and ended with popcorn in bed and a good book. No fireworks, but I got alot of good time with my husband (he beats fireworks anyday!)

While celebrating America's freedom from British rule is great, there's another freedom that came to my mind yesterday...

"There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death." --Romans 8:1-2

Let's not forget our ultimate freedom in all the hype of independence day.